There is a valid reason I haven’t visited my own blog for some time now. I have clocked in so many late nights at work in the last few weeks that aging and I got along famously. It used to be that I’d work a few late nights in a row and bounced right back after a cuppa but now it has been two cuppa and one nice rubdown at the soothing hands of my masseur and I still look frazzled.
As I come to the stark realisation that my body is no longer as enthusiastic as my mind and age is catching up inside, outside and everywhere, I just have to come up with my own list of…
You Know You Are Getting Older When:
1) You cut down half the amount of rice you consume at lunch but can still feel this hideous thing called FAT creepily swarm around your midsection even when you are so focused on typing on your keyboard.
2) At the drug store’s beauty shelve where you used to shop for anti-shine skincare for your skin that would break-out once a while in your 20s, you now shop DESPERATELY for anti-aging skincare for a very parched skin that just won’t shine no matter what you put on.
3) The annual visit to the Gynae is no longer about finding out about whether you are pregnant (again). He tells you bluntly that accidental pregnancy rarely happens for YOUR AGE. It’s also a necessity to go through the dreaded Mammogram and Pap Smear just to find out that you have survived another year of being disease-free.
4) You go shopping at your usual local fashions store and secretly curse the fashions buyer for having the audacity of promoting clothes meant for Kate Moss! You ask the store manager why the clothes there are getting smaller and instead of calling you Miss, she politely refers you as Ma’am and point you to a more “womanly” fashions store next to hers which you had sworn off at one point when you were younger that you would never wear THESE clothes lest you get called an Aunty. But sugar, what was once baggy, “womanly” clothes there at the “womanly” store now fit you like a glove!
5) The optician insists that your eye sight is not getting better just because you eat tonnes of carrots or goji berries everyday. You’d merely move from having near-sightedness to presbyopia.
6) You actually tune in to a local radio station that only blasts slow and easy songs from the 80s and 90s and think these are classics that come from a time when people really know what good music should sound like. You don’t really get what’s all the hypes surrounding One Direction or the song about what the fox says. Like hello, who cares what a fox says.
7) Instead of the casual, gentle and calm manner with which your doc advises you to take up an exercise AT LEAST three days a week, he suddenly sounds like a broken record that presses on the URGENCY of you doing any moderate form of exercise five days a week.
8) You put on your working pants and it feels so snug around the hips that you FINALLY believe the reading on your digital weighing scale (after complaining to your spouse that it has malfunctioned for over one year).
9) You and a bunch of younger colleagues go for a lunch date and you have almost finished chomping down half of your food when all these young earthlings ever did in the last five minutes were taking photos of their food to upload onto their Instagram and Facebook FIRST.
10) You start lecturing your kids and younger staff with these words, “When I was your age…” or, “During my time…”. Over and over again.
Not saying that I am very old or feel old all the time but I am just going to excuse myself for a little while as I need every minute from now on to get on some anti-aging secrets books and lifestyle changes to get back to my usual highs.
Ultimately laughter is the best medicine. May we live and make everyday count — let NOT our age define us. Stay healthy and jovial as always. Cheers!